Thursday, May 8, 2014

Finances and Adult Decisions

There are times when I think to myself how much it sucks to be a single woman with a child.  All decisions are mine, and while I like that most of the time (disciplining the way I want, naming Sidekick on my own, deciding the routine I want Sidekick to be on, etc.), I am terrified when it comes to making BIG steps in my life... especially those involving money. 

My condo is officially on the market, and I have made a contingent offer on a townhouse. I know the offer won't be immediately accepted, but it could be outright rejected because of the contingency of selling my condo.  I wanted a house, but this townhouse is perfect, and I'm surprised I went that direction.  It is much larger than our condo, great upgrades, large bedrooms/bathrooms, only seven years old, and in my price range.  I guess this will be my next step to owning a single family home, but for now, this place is great for us.

I met with a financial planner last week to discuss how to prepare for retirement, save for Sidekick's college, and plan for the future (God forbid something happens to me when Sidekick is young).  While I am quite a penny pincher and in a good financial situation, I'm not good enough to live as old as I'd like to without having Sidekick support me- haha!  So, it scares me when I remind myself that is up to me, and me only, to be financially secure.  I can make ends meet now without having any debt, but a bigger home with a bigger mortgage is going to make me really reevaluate my budget, and I refuse to have debt (other than a mortgage-- if that's considered debt). When I was thinking about being a SMC, I started saving for daycare.  By the time Sidekick started daycare, I had 15 months of daycare saved.  I couldn't have had him, if I hadn't done that. Why does money seem to rule our world???

It can be so discouraging when I see my married friends living the lifestyle they are. They can buy what they want, have really nice cars, live in large houses, their kids have everything they want and then some (which I totally do not agree with), and they don't have any debt either.  How is this possible?  They have TWO incomes!  Ugh!  Life would be easier with two incomes.  Now I know the grass isn't always greener on the other side, but it sure would be nice to know that someone other than myself is responsible for our future, our home, etc. 

Back to the offer on the townhome... we gave the seller until 10:00 tomorrow morning to respond.  In celebration of Mother's Day, Sidekick and I are going to a Superhero Mom/Son dance party tonight, so even if my phone rings with news, I will be ignoring the phone while I am bonding and having fun with my son.  After all... he is my superhero, and I am for sure his Super Mom!  I am, right?  : )


  1. You are both heroes! I sometimes think about life as an SMC in mathematical terms. As in as a single mom being a parent was twice the work for me. Then when I had my second child, it was four times the work other moms were doing. That's why I'm so tired and stretched an impossible number of ways. BUT I also recognize that all moms are doing 100% mothering. (I only use my "formula" when I feel like I'm not doing a great job at being a parent.)

  2. This. This is the stuffy I worry about. Feeling as though I need to wait at least two more years instead of just one to keep saving money. It would be the smartest thing financially to do... but my biggest concern is if waiting one year is the difference between baby and no baby? What if I miss my chance by not taking advantage of my young(er) fertility?

    Thanks for keeping it real. It's nice to see that the things I worry about are at least not a total waste of time ;)

    1. Lisa, I had no fears that I could raise a child alone. I'd have three if I could. BUT, I was terrified (and clearly still am) about the financial aspects of raising a child because I refuse to be in debt. When I was thinking about getting pregnant, not only did I start saving money for daycare, I kept a notebook with my budget and priced out day cares, diapers, formula, wipes, etc to find where they were cheapest... just to see how much of a chunk all of that would be out of my paycheck. I'm not sure how old you are, but I did eight IUIs and finally got pregnant three days shy of my 38th birthday.

  3. Good luck, hope you get it!!!