Sunday, November 27, 2011

My, How Quickly Things Change

I went for my 6w2d ultrasound right before I left town for Thanksgiving.  I was obviously very anxious and worried about what I would see since five days prior, I had learned that I was carrying two babies.  My RE quickly found a flickering heart beat and then noticed that the other sac did not grow.  I had a vanishing twin.  I hate to say that I was happy about it because I did lose a baby, but I was happy not to be in the position of carrying two babies and having the agony and pain of giving one of my babies to my friends.  In some respect I felt bad that I couldn't help my friends, but at the same time, it was a relief that I didn't have to be put in that position.  For the first time since I had seen the first ultrasound, I was really excited that I was having a baby!

It was strange how everyone who knew that I was pregnant with twins, all breathed a sigh of relief when I told them I had a vanishing twin.  Everyone worried about me having to separate my two babies and what that would do to me.  While I think they understood why I was doing it, they also were trying to figure out how "we" could make it happen so I could keep them both.  It was the first time when it felt like I/we could celebrate the fact that I successfully conceived a baby! 

I told my mom and her friend as soon as I got in town.  I pulled out some ginger ale, Saltine crackers, bagels, and peanut butter.  It took them a while for them to figure it out because her friend, with whom I was staying, told me that I didn't have to bring my own food.  When I kept asking if she had ginger ale and Saltine crackers, they still hadn't put it together.  As soon as they did, they were so excited.  My mom quickly asked me if there was only one and boy did I have a story to share with them!  When I told my mom's husband, he was over the moon about a little grandchild entering the world next July!

My RE released me which was kind of sad, and I will be going to my regular OB in a few days.  I'll get to see my baby again.  : )  There better not be any surprises like a second heart beat!  I'm not sure I could take that again!  It's strange to think there is a little human being growing inside me, and that soon I will responsible for this little being for the really, really, really long time.  While I am a little nervous about being a SMC, I am also so excited to meet this little creature that I made.  I know I can do this and my child and I will have a great life together. 

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