Sunday, January 4, 2015

"Ready or not, here I poop!"

Yep! Sidekick yelled that as soon as we got home from church last night.  Never did I imagine I would be so happy to hear such words out of his mouth.  He is officially potty trained!  I know I wrote previously how much it sucked, and it did really suck.  A lot.  It's the hardest thing I've had to do as a parent thus far.  Honestly. 

I never used pull-ups with him because I never saw the point in them.  I didn't want to confuse him when I put underpants on him since pull-ups and underpants are put on the same way.  I stopped putting diapers on Sidekick cold turkey right before Christmas (thinking the timing would be good because he'd be with me a lot because of the holidays and the days he was at school, there weren't as many kids for his teacher to juggle plus worry about him).  Sidekick got the peeing thing down pat!  No problems whatsoever.  Easy peasy.  He never had an accident.  The pooping thing was an entirely different issue!  Holy shit!  (haha no pun intended!) This kid refused to poop on the potty. I bribed with him a bowl of Dollar Store toys in his bathroom, watching extra TV, going out for ice cream, eating a cupcake, and even wrapping "big" presents that he would otherwise not get. His stubbornness was shining through.  The kid could not be bribed, much to my frustration. 

Over the course of nine days, he pooped in his underpants two times and one time in the bath tub. Are you doing the math?  That's not very often.  Why?  Because he was holding it in!  Little shit!  (again, no pun intended.)  I finally asked him what he wanted when he pooped on the potty, and his answer was, "Baby Jesus."  What?????!!!!  Like that's easy to produce. 

Last Friday, I bought some prune juice (so yuck!), picked him up from school, filled up a sippy cup with "special" juice (because he doesn't drink juice), brought his potty into the living room (which he doesn't use because he prefers the toilet), turned on the TV, and told him to poop on the potty.  Within about two minutes, he told me that he was pooping!  OMG!!!  I was so excited and so relieved because his poor little belly was so firm and distended, and I knew he wasn't feeling well.  He immediately asked for his present, and we celebrated by eating mini cupcakes. 

Over the course of four hours, he managed to squeeze out a little more poop three times just because he wanted another present that was wrapped.  I gave him another little one and bribed him by rewarding him with another cupcake.  So, just like that!  Sidekick is fully potty trained and has been great all weekend. 

I never imagined in my wildest dreams that I would ever be talking about pooping so much, but it stressed me out, which in turn stressed out Sidekick.  Not a good combination. 

My hellion of a kid that was around during Christmas has gone away and my sweet boy is back.  Thank goodness because I was having a tough time dealing with him.  My favorite line when I laid him in his crib on New Year's Eve was:

"Happy New Year, Momma.  You're stuck with me."
Seriously, where did that come from?  I think that he knew we had a rough ten days also, but that no matter what, we are stuck with each other, and thankfully that's not a bad thing. We make a good team.
Happy new year, friends!  May 2015 be more wonderful than you could ever hope, pray, or ask for. Thanks for joining us on our journey.


  1. That's hilarious! What a great start to 2015!

  2. OMG, Sidekick has me LOL! "Baby Jesus" and "you're stuck with me"? Hilarious kid!